Figuring out the help you need after the birth of your baby can be tricky. Your family members are coming to your home offering to feed, play and and care for your baby while you and your partner rest. However, having so much help in your home can be overwhelming. Sometimes you just want mom, dad and baby time!
So how can you figure out the kind of help you need after your baby arrives?
We learned via an article by The Bump, “Take a few days with the baby and experience what it’s like, and then you can decide what help will really help you,” says Lisa Spiegel, director of Soho Parenting, a support center for parents in New York City. This means that you may have to resist offers from family or friends to help during the first few days after the birth of your baby. Spiegel says, “It’s important to do this, so you find a rhythm with your baby and so you have a true sense of what will lighten your load — whether it’s cleaning, cooking or help taking care of baby.”
After using your personal experience to figure out what you truly need help with, consider these options:
1. Help From Your Partner
According to The Bump, many new moms feels like they can definitely use more help from their partners, but believe that their partner will not know what needs to be done. Spiegel says, “We need to debunk the myth that this should happen seamlessly…Adults need to say what they need. Partners would never run a business without meeting, but we think that our partners should just know what’s needed. It’s about meeting and talking and problem solving together.”
She recommends to take 15 minutes in your day to check in with your partner and figure out what each of you can do and should be doing to have a smooth day with your new baby.
2. Help From Family
If your family members are your main source of support and are offering help, spread out their visit so you and baby do not feel overwhelmed. Spiegal says, “If everyone is planning on coming right after baby is born, you could find yourself overwhelmed initially and without a soul in sight a few weeks later.” Instead, be appreciate of their help and let family members know of what is needed in an ongoing way.
3. Help From a Paid Caregiver
If your family is not your main source of support - or you do not want to ask them for help - you can hire a doula or baby nurse. You can interview potential helpers while pregnant and narrow the field down before your baby arrives. A postpartum doula helps the mother and family after baby arrives, whereas baby nurses stay in the family’s house 24/7 for a short period of time.
At Community Well, we offer several maternal health services to help new parents when baby arrives. Check out our doula services, new mom's support group, breastfeeding preparation and lactation clinic! To view more of our services, visit our maternal health tab.
The first few weeks with your baby will not be easy, but along with you friends and family, Community Well is here to help ease your journey! Stop by and visit us at The Well for all your pre and postpartum needs.